Tag: legion

On WoW 7.2 Class Mounts

Warrior: where does this drake come from? Oh, it has armor too? Nice.
Monk: Yo dawg, I heard you liked China
Warlock: updated fel-steed…with armor
Paladin: updated charger, looks much better
Mage: a purple flying cloud
Demon Hunter: a fel-bat (i feel like that’s already being released as a general mount)
Death Knight: finally Unholy Death Knights have a frost wyrm all to themselves
Hunter: a flying wolf
Rogue: a raven
Priest: an…owl-gryphon?
Druid: a giant owl? Isn’t one travel shape-shift enough?
Shaman: Blizzard designer goes “alright, we’ve nerfed shaman all to hell. How can we make them suck even more? I’ve got it! We’ll have them ride a giant, dumb-looking wind elemental! Brilliant!”

So i’ve been playing World of Warcraft off and on since 2009. I would not consider myself a “casual gamer” by any definition of the term. However, with the release of Legion, I’ve come to realize that Blizzard has remade Burning Crusade, to the point where it’s either “hardcore or gtfo.”

Example: my main is a 110 Elemental Shaman, item level 850. It was an uphill battle to get that gear, through dungeons, world quests, heroic dungeons, mythic dungeons, and even trying the Emerald Nightmare raid. The drop-rate of everything is so low, it’s not even worth farming them. I specifically remember the low drop-rate in PvE content from pre-Cataclysm Old World zones and Burning Crusade zones in Outland: the drop-rate of gear in Legion dungeons is lower than that! What’s worse, because Blizzard seems to hate Elemental Shaman, what gear that did manage to drop reduced my essential stats (critical strike, intellect and haste).

But wait, it gets worse. At some point in late 7.0 to 7.1, a trend appeared among dungeon-goers where, for whatever reason and without warning or explanation, I will be booted from the dungeon and given the deserter debuff. Now i can understand, back in the old days, being booted for not knowing my class, and i can understand if i make a dumb mistake over and over again and get booted for that, hell, if you want to be extra br00tal, i can even understand being kicked for causing one wipe. But what i can’t understand is being kicked from normal dungeons without warning or cause (to say nothing of heroic or mythic dungeons, which will lock you out for one day to one week)! So now we’re back to how it was for me during my grind through classic and Burning Crusade zones, where dungeons were not fun.

Unfortunately, my gear can’t magically git moar g00d, as you fucktards are certain to recommend! Having had a taste of mythic dungeons and a few pieces of gear dropping from them, normal dungeons, heroic dungeons and even LFR, are useless for gear grinding. Hell, world quests are still dropping heroic gear and artifact relics, so they’re useless too. The only way to ‘git moar g00d’ is to do mythic dungeons and raids, both of which i am blacklisted from for whatever reasons from the fucktards in mythic dungeons and because my guild died from a mass-exodus of the leading members.

Before the guild died, one of the members recommended a long list of IcyVeins recommendations (probably by some Canadian/Australian/British YouTube fucktard who worships Burning Crusade and sucks garrosh’s dick), as well as dps count add-ons. Having already respec’d according to those recommendations, i still get kicked from dungeon groups for no reasons. I will NEVER get a dps counter! I hate those! They were used against me back in the day, and they took all the fun out of playing the game, since i had to be constantly worrying about being the best or get kicked from the group (i don’t care what you said, Fists of Glory members, i was the reason we kept wiping on Emerald Nightmare and you know it!). Also, the main reason my dps sucks isn’t because of some virus-ridden add-on made by some fucktard in Australia to cheat the gaming system and exclude young Shaman like myself from PvE content.

The main reason is that my computer sucks. Yes, that’s it. I have a low-end machine that can barely run Legion on low settings: frame-rate is never in the 30s, and in New Dalaran it averages at 1 fps. Unfortunately, as i am not Nixxiom, Wowcrendor, danger-fucking-dolan, heelsvsbabyface, Taliesin, or any one of the countless number of Canadian/Australian/British YouTube bloggers who play Wow worship Burning Crusade, i don’t have money to throw away on upgrading my computer or buying a gaming machine: i have even less money since being diagnosed with ulcerative colitis (it seems that even insured medical care is costly: thanks obama). So i have to make due with a laggy game, which makes my dps suffer, and no money to fix that.

So in short, i do feel that Legion is like Burning Crusade. I feel like i’m being punished for being unable to have a decent computer, locked out of PvE content, excluded from dungeons, shafted from getting proper gear, and generally penalized for not being a “hardcore” gamer. I’m sure this comes as a relief to the aforementioned fucktards, and you all Burning Crusade dick-suckers, but this might be the end of WoW for me, seeing as how it is no longer fun to play and i can get more enjoyment from writing or making music. If you want to comment about “whining”, kindly fuck off and eat a dick, Burning Crusade hipster!

Now That the Hype is Dead…

I think the class hall campaigns are my favorite parts. Despite the fact that you’re forced to do 30 world quests before completion, they are unique and i enjoy the followers you get to command. I like that the vrykul get a chance at redemption, rather than just being dismissed as “just another bad guy race”, like in Wrath of the Lich King. The artifacts are pretty cool, though obviously some new ones had to be created so that every class spec has a unique weapon. A lot of people hated the fact that you’re being given a place of prominence in your class (i’m guessing these are the same ones who are okay with you being quite literally god in Elder Scrolls Morrowind): for me, and my brother, it seems a well-waranted merit, having beaten the Lich King, Deathwing, and endured two pointless expansions after another, AND survived the Broken Shore.

Fucking Suramar! Most of what i hate about this expansion comes from this zone. I can’t stand the Nightfallen junkies, or the prickish Nightbourne who make Taran Zhu’s racism seem innocent by comparison. Sylvanas becoming Warchief. The retcon of Illidan’s betrayal to become more like “illidan’s great misunderstanding”. The big steaming dump Blizzard took on Thrall, reducing him to less than nothing for the sake of you garrosh fan-boys. Lastly, what i hate the most is how this expansion has become Burning Crusade 2.0, from main characters, enemies, hostile races, and even the content wall of “hardcore or gtfo” that BC was so famous for.

WoW Legion burnout

So once I did all the heroic dungeons in Legion, I was really excited to do mythic dungeons. Those first premiered in Mists of Pandaria, but i didn’t like Mists of Pandaria, so there was no incentive to see the mythic versions of those dungeons and raids (unless it were Throne of Thunder or Siege of Orgrimmar). In Warlords of Draenor, there was that proving grounds wall, which i barely passed with my main and couldn’t pass with my healer alt, so there was a permanent barrier to doing mythics in Warlords. But that wall was gone, replaced only by an item lvl barrier which i quickly passed with my main.

Unfortunately, the now default ‘personal’ loot setting, and a drop-rate that is worse than Rivendare’s Deathcharger, the Ashes of A’lar and the Blazing Drake combined, means this: of all possible loot to drop in a dungeon of any difficulty, 1% will drop, and of that 1%, 0.0001% will be for your class of choice. Because of that, it took forever to get enough gear to become available for raiding. Also, because Blizzard seems to HATE elemental shaman, the only gear that dropped reduced all of my necessary stats, which resulted in increased douche-bag behavior in dungeons: ie., getting kicked without warning and for no reason.

As everyone in my guild got burned out and don’t ever log on anymore, there is no hope of ever getting better gear, and it’s depressing since they were fun people. So now there’s another brick wall, just like in Warlords of Draenor: all the lore content is locked behind a progression wall, just like in fan-favorite Burning-fucking-Crusade, which the game seems determined to never let me experience.

I’m sure you all are just waiting to start calling me a “whining, filthy casual”. Well, the truth is that I don’t have time to spend on World of Warcraft, since I have to be looking for work on a daily basis. So yes, i am a “casual” player.

So unless we get some new questing zones that aren’t fucking Suramar, i’m starting to wonder if Legion will be worth the time.

Suramar: the one thing i hate about Legion

Okay, so you know that I love the World of Warcraft expansion Legion so much. There hasn’t really been much about it that I didn’t like: maybe Aszuna is a little boring, but that’s about it. However, there is one zone that I hate with a passion.

Suramar!

Aside from the fact that, because my computer is low-end and can’t be upgraded (two years is apparently too old to update the graphics card), the game runs at single-digit frame-rate in this zone, there are about half a dozen lore-reasons why I can’t stand this place.

1) It craps on the lore of Warcraft II

In Warcraft II, Gul’dan rose the Broken Island from the seas to find the Tomb of Sargeras. While most of the zones in this game do crap on this lore, stating that races have been living (ie. thriving) on the islands for ten thousand years, Suramar is the worst offender for the number two reason.

2) It erases Maiev’s one redeeming trait

Remember this night elf from Warcraft III’s expansion, The Frozen Throne? Every word out of her mouth was “I hate Illidan!”, quickly followed by “I hate Tyrande!” Seriously, she’s the b*tch who tried to manipulate Malfurion into killing Illidan by lying about Tyrande dying. I’m no fan of Illidan demon-dick-sucking Stormrage, but honestly, Maiev, take up a hobby or something!

But the one redeeming trait that Maiev had that existed in Frozen Throne was her sorrow for her people’s lost civilization. When her Wardens reach the Broken Isles, she is practically brought to tears upon walking through the sunken, coral-encrusted ruins of, you guessed it, Suramar.

Well, Legion just retconned that. Instead of a sunken ruin, it’s a living, breathing city. So what, Maiev’s only redeeming trait is just tossed into the nameless void into which Jaina’s kindness and Sylvanas’ old voice disappeared?

3) The Nightbourne are dicks

Not since Mists of Pandaria have I been as disgusted by such a dickish race. Every word out of their mouths is filled with disdain for outsiders, even for non-Withered of their own race: that’s not even mentioning the experiments they subject the Withered to. Hell, even the children make fun of outsiders.

4) They’re fucking junkies

Back in Warcraft III’s lore, it was explained that arcane magic was not as benign as most people think. Instead, it is what brought the Burning Legion to Azeroth during the War of the Ancients, the Night Elves’ experiments of the arcane magic of the Well of Eternity. The High Elves, being addicted little pussies who couldn’t give up magic like the Night Elves, ran away to the Eastern Kingdoms and made the Sunwell which, after it was destroyed, caused them to become junkies who sold their souls to the Burning Legion (looking at you Kael’thas, aka. the second-biggest patsy in Azeroth).

Well, just like the Blood Elves, the Nightbourne have spent ten thousand years addicted to their own magical font, the Night-Well. And being away from it also turns them into magically-addicted junkies, crawling around in their own filth, scratching at themselves like they’ve been missing their last heroin fix.

5) Their backstory is stupid

Following through on the whole “arcane magic isn’t bad” retcon, the backstory of the Nightbourne has them realize that Azshara is bad, but they don’t reject magic like the wise Malfurion and the rest of the Night Elves. Instead, they say “fuck everyone else” and create their little Atlantis bubble to keep their city away from everyone else. Of course their leaders basically turned into Azshara in the end, fixating their place as supreme dicks. It’s Blizzard breaking their own rules.

6) Blizzard makes you enable them!

The quests in Suramar make it so that you HAVE to feed the addiction of these douche-bags or else they just scratch themselves and mumble like heroin-addicts missing their last fix. I don’t even like Kael’thas for selling his people out to the demons to “cure” their addiction for magic, and yet you make me enable these junkies?

7) You have an aggro radius a mile wide

There you are, questing in Suramar, trying to kill one mob or one rare. You cast your spell or move in for the attack…and pull EVERYONE within 40 yards!

Fuck this zone and these fucking douche-bag junkies!

So, because i still haven’t learned my lesson that tumblr is where fandoms go to die, i went to the “vrykul” tag.

All of you all hating on them can eat a dick.

I understand that Blizzard is incapable of doing vikings properly. But it’s better than nothing! And no, they’re not “boring”, you’re just a racist dick. I honestly felt disappointed that shaman got to hang out on the edge of the Maelstrom and warriors get to go to fucking Valhalla! Makes me want to re-roll as a warrior just to experience that awesome!

Also, as an Elder Scrolls fan, Svergan Stormcloak made me smile.