@jewishpolitics, you like the Marvel movies, but you also like Gal Gadot. let me ask you something that is a little too big for the ask-box.

okay, so it seems that, no matter what the DC films do, they get almost universally panned. i mean, i actually liked the Suicide Squad movie, but Man of Steel and Batman v. Superman were a mess. but in general, a lot of people seem to hate all of their films (yes, there was a big fan reaction in favor of Batman v. Superman, but overall it seemed to not be received well with the critics).

this year, we’re going forward with the Wonder Woman movie. now, giving it the benefit of the doubt and hoping that it won’t be objectively bad (like Tank Girl, Supergirl, Electra and Catwoman were), i feel that there’s going to be a great conundrum about this movie. on the one hand, the critics will most likely hate it because it’s not the jokey, campy, bright MCU. on the other hand, they will be tripping over themselves to say something positive about it, since it’s Wonder Woman’s first movie and they don’t want to appear “sexist” (you know, like with the disaster that was the Ghostbusters remake)

so here is my question to you: do you think that the Wonder Woman movie will be the first DCCU movie to be well-received, or do you think there will be confusion over whether to accept it or not, based on the fact that it’s not a Marvel movie, and a lot of fans and critics are spoiled on the tone of superhero movies of the MCU?

Smallville in Retrospect

So we finally made it to season 10, the final season. Dear God, i forgot how nauseatingly liberal this season was! And during the reign of king barry nonetheless! i mean, this whole anti-vigilante, pro-maximum security thing are the hallmarks of a Clinton administration, and yet it’s being pushed as if it’s conservatives who are the ones behind it! Well, canada, you have no clue about how small, Midwestern towns truly are, and you don’t have a clue about how American politics work! But then again, you gave us justin bieber and fucking trudeau: congratulations, canada! Jon Snow knows more than you do!

On that note, I can speak with a surety that the fanboys who hate on the latter seasons in favor of the annoying, soap-opera, Lana-centric first four seasons are not doing so out of disgust for its liberal slant: Smallville was made by canadians, it was always influenced by liberalism. I cannot see anything instrinsically better in the first four seasons over the latter seasons. I mean, I’m pleased that the latter seasons threw in so much DC Comics lore into the story, from Geoff Johns’ saving the day with “Absolute Justice” to the Zatanna episodes and other stuff (oh, did you miss Black Adam’s dagger in the episode “Isis”?).

While i’m certain that i was unable to convince my brother that Callum Blue’s oversexualized Zod (he behaved in similar fashion to Oscar Isaac’s oversexualized Apocalypse from X-Men…Apocalypse) was better than commie bastard Michael Shannon’s specific Zod, he did get a kick out of Hawkman (who was immensely more capable than the version that appeared in Legends of Tomorrow – both him and Hawkgirl) talking smack to “soap opera” Green Arrow. Hey, Justin Hartley might have had more time on whatever soap opera he’s in right now, but at least he looks his co-stars in the eye when he’s talking to them. I will say this, Stephen Amell’s “I am the Green Arrow” reveal beat out the one in Smallville by a long shot.

While we’re comparing notes with Smallville and CW’s current run of DC Comics shows, let’s talk about…one of my least favorite characters in both universes, Cat Grant. In Supergirl, she’s presented as this tough-as-nails liberal mouthpiece who, despite being a feminazi, will ultimately defer to the opinions of Kara’s male co-workers over her own. Just another out-of-touch hypocrite, like Hillary Clinton. In Smallville, she is presented as a 40-years-younger version of Dolores Umbridge, complete with Hello Kitty paraphernalia. Also she is a conservative caricature: and not even a so-bad-it’s-good caricature that can be reclaimed, like Nick Offerman’s character from Parks and Recreation. I suppose this portrayal colored my view of Cat Grant with a nauseating shade of pink that Supergirl’s portrayal did nothing to change. I do have to wonder if the part about her son and her broken marriage are from the comics, since both appeared in both universes.

Then again, not all comparisons need be negative ones. Fem-Lex, aka. Tess Mercer, brought a delightful amount of true Americanism into a predominantly canadian show (inwardly, i squeal with delight every time i hear her correctly pronounce “about” or any word like “bag”). I also realized that she has the opposite arc of Lex Luthor: whereas we are introduced to Lex as a good man, fighting to get out from under the shadow of his past, and eventually succumbing to that darkness, Tess starts out as an antagonist, who is slowly turned into a helpful and eventually sympathetic character, fighting to get out from under the shadow of her past and the Luthor name. Nevertheless, like how they brought up Julian Luthor at least three times in the last few seasons, her reveal as a long-lost Luthor scion is an apparent soap opera trait.

Still on the subject of comparisons, Smallville’s Amanda Waller may have been closer to the proper weight of the character than Arrow’s Waller, but she was still too good looking. Also Smallville’s Rick Flag (aka. Dick Flag) was infinitely worse than the one from the Suicide Squad movie. And I had a laugh making fun of old man General Tullius Deathstroke on Smallville, especially since Smallville’s Slade is an evil military general who is imposing his repressive political regime in the name of higher and darker forces, exactly like Tullius in Skyrim.

Maybe it’s because we both played Soul Calibur IV and The Force Unleashed, where every time he gets hit he whines like a little b*tch, but my brother and I saw Sam Witier as Doomsday’s “human” side as lame and whiny and annoying beyond belief. Also we both agreed that it was cheap to bring in Jimmy Olsen, kill him off, then have his younger twin brother take up his mantle and name in the not-so-distant future (2017, when the show’s “future” happens, is now!).

But I digress. The latter seasons, for all their flaws, were still enjoyable. We got to see plenty of great superheroes onscreen, and, despite the show giving us the slip in that last episode, we got to see Clark finally accept his destiny as Superman. Despite all of Smallville’s many flaws, I think something that endeared this version of Superman to us was not merely because they made him “human” and “relatable” (i saw myself in his struggles with his father, especially in the conflict between his personal desires and his greater destiny), but because we kind of grew up with him. For better or worse, we had Clark Kent for a significant part of our lives (for me, it started around season 5 and continued until the very end).

Retrospective

So i’ve been re-watching all ten seasons of Smallville (about half-way through season 5). It sort of feels like looking back at high school (except mine was full of self-loathing, embarrassing memories and loneliness, not soap opera drama and sex). But there are a few things that i’ve discovered while re-watching the show, especially the early seasons; you know, the ones everyone says are the “good” ones.

Even when he’s trying to be cool, Clark Kent is still a dork. Lana Lang is more of a mary sue than Rey. Chloe was insufferable in the first four seasons. The show REALLY went out of its way to take a dump on the comic book origins of Superman. Green kryptonite was used to weaken Clark, whereas red kryptonite was used to have nauseating levels of soap opera drama shit, more-so than usual. The early 2000s music that appears frequently throughout the show really pulls my heart-strings. The show has a BIG bone to pick against God, which it takes out on the Clark and Jor-El father-son relationship; turning the father figure into an outright manipulative tyrant.

The whole Clark and Lana “secrets” bullshit thing is stupid! Even though i haven’t been in many relationships, the ones i have been in were NOT 100% open on everything. There were some things that we kept from each other, as we knew the value of privacy. Seriously, if i had been as psychotically inquisitive into someone’s personal life as Lana was into Clark’s, i’d have been slapped with a restraining order.

I didn’t realize just how liberal this show was!

In other news, the first four seasons are not my favorite: but the worst has got to be season 4, when jensen ackles appeared and Lana became the focal point of the show.