Garrosh, son of Gromash, of the Warsong Clan. Possibly the most controversial figure in World of Warcraft lore. If you took the leader of isis, kim-jong un and all the things fear-mongering liberals and rinos said about donald trump, you would have something close to this brown orc. And yet for some reason, he is beloved by a large majority, even over established characters from Warcraft I, II and III. Most of the support from him comes from the over-used modern trend of revisionism: you know, the same kind of bullshit we get from every single movie, TV show, book and video game made in the past sixteen years, where the bad guy isn’t really bad, he’s just “misunderstood” or “doing what he can for x-good-intended reasons”. While this kind of revisionism is ALWAYS made to make the bad guys seem good, but never to justify the good guys, it has been over-used so much that it needs to stop. And though I won’t be changing any minds here, I will at least be doing my part to end this bullshit trend by showing that this thick-necked fuck is NOT “misunderstood” and that his actions were for his own glory and not for anyone else.

So let’s start off with a little back-story. Garrosh was the son of Grom Hellscream, chieftain of the Warsong Clan, who was part of the Horde and agreed to drink the pitlord Mannoroth’s blood. This cursed the entire Orcish race with green skin and a bloodlust that would eventually bring about their ruin. But there were some who resisted: a small minority, called the Mag’har, refused to drink the blood and were exiled to the fields of Nagrand, where they apparently survived the destruction of Draenor in relative peace. As a young Orc, Garrosh was kept with the Mag’har and did not drink the demon’s blood. However, because his father had done so, Garrosh was basically marked for dishonor from birth and, by the time of his first appearance in Burning Crusade, he has fallen into a state of lethargic depression because all the Mag’har Orcs treated him like shit because of his father (you know, kind of like the same lethargy that befell his people after they lost the Second War and the demons just gave up on them).

Along comes Thrall, Warchief of the Horde, who tells Garrosh that his father died honorably, killing Mannoroth and saving the entire Orcish race from demonic corruption (which is why i will never play as an Orc warlock). Thrall gave Garrosh a new sense of purpose and, because of this, one would think that Garrosh would be eternally grateful to the one who changed his life for the better. Right?

When the Undead Scourge rears its ugly head again, Garrosh challenges Thrall’s leadership, claiming that the Horde should have wiped out the other races of Azeroth during the First War (and this long before he ever became Warchief). It is here that Thrall, who’s biggest problem when it comes to Grom is wearing rose-colored glasses about his memory, realizes that Garrosh might be more like his father than he first believed.

Allow me to go off on a tangent here to explain some of Grom’s backstory in collusion with Garrosh’s for those who haven’t played Warcraft III (which is to say about 80% of World of Warcraft players). In his first real appearance (not counting Warcraft II: Beyond the Dark Portal, where he is basically a paste-eating, sings-worse-than-rebecca-black reskinned grunt with an intelligence check of negative 100), Grom is considered a brother to Thrall, who rescues him from imprisonment by the humans of Lordaeron (interesting that he begins his journey behind bars, and ends his journey in Warlords of Draenor also behind bars. So much for “we will never be slaves”). However, during the Orcish campaign, Grom proves to be more of a liability than any real assistance. Upon encountering the humans, he willfully antagonizes them, even after Thrall tells him to stand down, arguing that “the wretches deserved death”. Then, in an act that could only be categorized on a scale of one to Illidan in poor, short-sighted decision-making, Grom drinks Mannoroth’s blood again, despite warnings from his fellow clansmen that giving into the bloodlust is against the new ways. Grom counters this by saying that this is what the Orcs were meant to become, vessels of wanton destruction, and happily drinks the blood, damning himself and the entire Orcish race before killing the Night Elves’ demi-god Cenarius (spoiler alert: he comes back, only to be killed again). After being saved from the bloodlust by the combined efforts of Thrall and Jaina, Grom accompanies Thrall to the canyon to face Mannoroth. The last act of Grom Hellscream’s life was to accept responsibility for the shit he put Thrall and the other orcs through by killing Mannoroth, thereby ending the hold the demons had upon the Orcish race.

Now let’s look at Garrosh and see how this poor, misunderstood “hero” stands up in comparison.

After Thrall chides him for his recklessness, saying that he is more like his father than he wants to believe, Garrosh gets triggered and demands Mak’Gorah, the honorable combat between Orcs, in order to wrest control of the Horde from Thrall. For a moment it seems that Garrosh would win until the Scourge attacks Orgrimmar and the Horde has to now fight for their lives. With this sudden threat looming, Thrall assigns Garrosh to lead the Horde advance upon Northrend from the west, as Sylvanas Windrunner sends Putress to leade the advance from the east. It is during this time that Varian Wrynn, the king of Stormwind, returns to claim his throne for the Alliance. Before the quite out of character personality shift that occurred between him and Jaina Proudmore in Mists of Pandaria (another reason MoP sucked), Varian was the human version of Garrosh: a hate-filled prick who wanted to wipe all orcs from the face of Azeroth because of what they did to him.

Like his father before him, Garrosh willfully antagonizes the human king, despite being told not to by Thrall. Furthermore, during the Argent Tournament, which both Thrall and Garrosh attend, Garrosh berates the tournament and Tirion Fordring, as well as further antagonizing King Varian and sending his champions to their deaths in the tournament after a stupid Gnome warlock summons an Eredar demon and Garrosh believes it to be an assassination attempt by Varian. Remember these well, for it will be very significant later on.

After the fall of the Lich King, Thrall, with the Cataclysm threatening the world and his ‘Grom was my brother’ rose-colored glasses firmly in place, gives the position of Warchief of the Horde to Garrosh. The young Orc has initial misgivings about running the Horde, but Thrall tells him that he has seasoned advisors to help him with the ruling.

But Garrosh is more like his father than Thrall wants to believe. Rather than listening to his advisors, Garrosh flies by the seat of his pants, making decisions according to his own judgment and listening to no one else unless they mindlessly agree with him. One of his first acts as Warchief is to kick everyone out of Orgrimmar who isn’t an Orc, because “only the strongest may dwell in Orgrimmar.” More than simply antagonize the humans, Garrosh antagonizes his own fellow leaders, first by threatening Vol’jin, leader of the Trolls, then Sylvanas (but we’ll let that slide since he was right about her), then straight up murdering Cairne Bloodhoof, leader of the Tauren. This couldn’t have come at a worse time, as now both the Horde and the Alliance have leaders that hate the other and are ready and willing to sacrifice anyone’s life in order to destroy the other.

This all comes to a point in Mists of Pandaria, where Garrosh, in an act that is in no way out of character from everything he’s done so far, uses a goblin mana-bomb to wipe Theramore off the map, killing thousands and turning Jaina Proudmore into a murderous psychopath just like him. But this is not enough for Garrosh. No, he intends to follow through with his initial threat, to wipe out all non-Orcs from Azeroth. With that, very much like his father, Garrosh taps into the powers of Y’Shaarj, the old god known as the Sha by the Pandaren, and both the Horde and Alliance have to besiege Orgrimmar in order to stop him. Though he is stopped, he is not killed, as the Pandaren decide to give him a trial for his crimes on Pandaria: it is during this, however, that Kairozdormu, a Bronze Dragon aided by Wrathion of the Black Dragonflight, breaks Garrosh out of prison and takes him back in time to before the First War, when the Orcish clans were first invited by Gul’dan to drink of Mannoroth’s blood and become the Horde.

Despite all the temporal shockwaves this should have caused, it does very little to the present day Azeroth besides have an army of Iron Horde orcs invade from the Dark Portal and try to attack Stormwind via Blackrock Mountain. However, this is enough to drive the Horde and the Alliance back into Draenor of the past to stop the Iron Horde. Before it is revealed that the Grom of the past has been put in prison, and his earlier comments about never being enslaved were just hot air, and the Gul’dan of the past takes over the Iron Horde, Garrosh has been put in command of the Warsong Clan by his father (after murdering his rescuer, the Bronze Dragon Kairozdormu) and begins attacking the Draenei and Orcs in Nagrand. The confrontation reaches a climax when Thrall faces Garrosh in single combat. Throughout the fight, Garrosh taunts Thrall, saying that he was weak and was never a “true” warchief. Then, when Thrall uses the elements to grant him victory (which, apparently, pissed them off to the point where Doomhammer left his control), Garrosh’s final words are “you made me what I am”, before Thrall replies that he chose his own destiny and then kills him.

Why he is problematic:

Garrosh antagonizes everyone, from his own allies to the Alliance, which the Horde doesn’t need, especially with Garrosh killing Horde leaders and weakening the Horde in general. The Second War proved that the Alliance could defeat the Horde, even when they had the help of the Amani trolls, the ogres, goblins and the Red Dragonflight. Yet Garrosh chose to evict all non-Orc members of the Horde, believing that only Orcs deserved to live in Azeroth and that the Orcs were destined to conquer the other races. He blew up Theramore. He tapped into the powers of the old gods in order to enact his plans for world domination. He is partially responsible for Warlords of Draenor (and since everyone hated that, that should be another reason to hate him). But the worst part, and i will break my self-censorship law for this sole purpose, the one reason why Garrosh is problematic and undeserving of being called a “hero” in any sense of the word:

He’s a bitch.

Seriously, he can’t take criticism from anyone. Not Thrall, not his advisors, not the fellow leaders of the Horde. He’s not cut out to be a proper leader. And he got all triggered when Thrall compared him to Grom. Of course, once he has all the power of the Horde behind him, he’s more than willing to slaughter everyone (in Warsong Hold, he argues with the great and invincible Varrok Saurfang that the Horde – the demon-cursed Horde to which his father belonged – was justified in slaughtering Draenei children because they weren’t “born into innocence”). Then, when he is put into a position of powerlessness, his final words are to lay the blame for everything he did on Thrall.

Really? Thrall made you what you are? Warchief, I’ll give you that: Thrall naively believed that you possessed the positive qualities of Grom and none of the negative ones. But made you? When you said that the Orcs should have wiped out all the other races of Azeroth during the First War, did Thrall make you say that? Was it Thrall who implanted in your head the idea that even Draenei children were not innocent and deserving of death? Did Thrall force you to antagonize Varian? Was it the instruction of Thrall that made you believe surrounding yourself with yes-men was the right way to lead the Horde? Did Thrall force you to kill Cairne Bloodhoof? Did Thrall force you to evict all non-Orcs from Orgrimmar? Did Thrall make you blow up Theramore? Was it Thrall’s instruction that made you believe that unleashing the power of Y’Shaarj was the only key to victory? Did Thrall make you sell the entire Orcish race out to Gul’dan yet again?

NO! That was all on you! But, instead of owning your mistake like your father, you bitched out at the end and blamed it all on Thrall. That puts you in the same bitch-category as Kylo Ren and MCU Loki.

For those of you who agree with Grom, in that the Horde was always meant to be machines of mindless destruction and that Garrosh is only living that out to its logical conclusion, I reply that this is impractical. For some reason, the Orcs can’t go back to Outland (i don’t think it’s ever fully explained), so they have no choice but to live in Azeroth. As such, they can’t be a mindless mass of killing machines, especially since the Alliance is more than capable (and willing) to fight and exterminate them if need be. Therefore, Garrosh’s policies are exactly what the Horde does NOT need, especially with Varian as King. I know that people will point out “but it’s WARcraft, not peace-craft”. To which i agree: the Horde and the Alliance fighting are the center of the Warcraft universe. But they fight best when fighting a singular threat, like the Lich King or the Legion. That doesn’t excuse Garrosh in the least, he’s still a bitch.

Love, a loyal Horde player since Warcraft III